I Think You Should Quote

I Think You Should Leave Quote Database

• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Who will be the baby of the year? Look at their rolls. Look at their folds. Look at their rummy, bummy tummies. Heads are round. Bellies are squishy. Look at their toes. Like so many curled canned shrimp. Are they ticklish? Are they jigglish? Can they be tricked? Can they be chucked? Which ones will move? Which ones will talk? But more important, which ones can dance? Oh, who will be Baby of the Year?
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Fuck you, Harley Jarvis!
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  We got a certified chode on our hands. Little tuna can.
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Mr. Jarvis is one of the most aggressive babies I've ever met. He has a massive underbite and completely flat back of the head.

  - Dr. Skull
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  I hope you fucking die, Harley Jarvis!
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Get him out of here!
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  I'm honestly done. I don't want to read anymore.

  - Dr. Skull
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  It's Porkins by a mile. The button nose, the apple cheeks... He's the best baby.

  - Kim
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  If Taffy Lee Fubbins isn't the Best Baby of the Year, I'll kill myself on live TV.

  - Jennifer
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  All right, that... That's it. I have to get this off my chest. Earlier today, when I was waiting to use the private bathroom, I witnessed Michael Patrick Porkins' father performing oral on the mystery judge of the competition.

  - Greg
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  I've been conflicted about whether to say anything, because I feel like Michael Patrick Porkins could win it even without the oral.

  - Greg
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  His father didn't need to do the oral. And that is why this is so tough... for me to tell about the oral.

  - Greg
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Calm down, they're old ones. They don't stay babies forever, idiot. Fucking stupid asshole.
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Little Denny Doo Dinkins, 92, respiratory failure.
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Shirley Cratsworth Shane, 78, car crash.
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  In Memoriams don't usually include how they died.

  - Kim
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Little Jeffy Jeremy, 96, throat slashed.
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  All right, you know what? This is dumb. Dump it. Trash it. This one's garbage.
  

  

  
• Baby of the Year, Season: 1, Ep: 1

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  Tiny Dinky Daffy, 92, pancaked by drunk dump truck driver.